


The Best Version Possible

by Aria



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Big Lup Feelings, Cooking, Families of Choice, Forgiveness, M/M, Memories, Normal Combat Spells Repurposed For Sex, Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-10
Updated: 2019-04-10
Packaged: 2020-01-11 02:50:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,342
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18421284
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aria/pseuds/Aria
Summary: Even at the end of the world,I love youis a lot.Or: in which Taako falls in love, reconnects with his family, and figures out how to live in the world they all made together.





	The Best Version Possible

**Author's Note:**

> [TAZscripts](http://tazscripts.tumblr.com/tazscripts) was incredibly helpful, both because I'm terrible at retaining audio-only information in the first place and because it was so much easier to do a gdocs word search than to scrub through episodes when checking for a piece of canon or dialogue. I'm really grateful to have those transcriptions as a resource.
> 
> Blame: filiabelialis for gently shoving TAZ at me until I cared about it, listening while I yelled at them about Taako, betaing this mess of feelings; Justin McElroy, just, frankly, how _dare_ he.

After the Hunger, after the story and song, as true night rolls across the world below and stars blink awake in the benign dark sky above, the moon base turns to celebration. It feels equal parts hysterical and relieved, the lifting of an impossible threat making everyone feel giddy and reckless and alive. Of the _Starblaster_ 's crew, only Merle is absent, jettisoned planetside hours ago to be with his kids. Magnus, bright-eyed with joy, is swinging Carey around on the dance floor while Killian looks on in amusement from near the canapes; the three of them have been together since the party started, as Carey refuses to leave either of their sides. Barry and Lucas are several glasses of wine into a cheerful argument about robotics. Even Davenport has gotten into the spirit of things, and seems to be animatedly discussing aerial mechanics with Avi. Lucretia is--

Who cares where Lucretia is. The important thing is where Lup is, and Lup is right here, the weightless static energy of the place where her hand should be resting on Taako's arm. Taako keeps giving sidelong glances to the shape of her, familiar-unfamiliar, feeling dizzy. He hasn't had much to drink, but he also doesn't remember the last time he took a meditative rest -- was it before Wonderland? -- and even on a less challenging day, the amount of magical power he's expended would be enough to leave him lightheaded. But it's also ... it's Lup.

It's being able to breathe again after spending a decade with only half his lungs, half his self.

"Bangin' party," Lup's voice says from within the darkness of her red cowl, the most familiar voice on any world.

"Uh huh," Taako agrees absently, and it's only when the cowl swings to look at him that he realizes that he failed to pick up what she was putting down, that this was Lup's _this party is boring and we need to light it up_ voice, that he _missed_ \--

"Babe," Lup says, the crackle of her not-touch against his sleeve. She doesn't say anything else, as though when Taako didn't take her line she was left hanging.

"You know, old Barold was really resourceful all these years," Taako finds himself saying. He turns to the place where Lup's face should be, remembering how to smile, remembering what his face does when he wants to reassure his sister, ill-fitting in a way he only notices because he's so fucking tired. "Your taste isn't terrible, who'd've thought."

"Grim Reaper," Lup reminds him, and Taako waves it aside.

"No, listen," he says. "Barry kept making himself new bodies. I bet there's some -- some physical part of you somewhere that we could use the same way." Lup is still looking at him, expressionless because she has no expression to wear, and now that Taako's started talking he can't stop. "This is a world to try with a corporeal form. We didn't really have time to check out the fashion districts together, you know? Goldcliff has a good one. We'll get you something stylin', and I -- I'll braid your hair, I bet our dye jobs won't be complimentary, Barold wouldn't plan for that." 

It's a spill of nonsense, more than he meant to say, much less than he _wants_ to, but he hasn't had a spa day with his sister in over a decade and he wants it with a sort of clawing hungry desperation that he's also too tired to be scared of or stop. 

"I'm thinking platinum or purple," Lup says, the voice from within her cowl cheerful and light, understanding him entirely, his heart, his heart. Taako must be more exhausted than he thought, or the rush of relief he feels wouldn't make his vision dance with spots. "Depending on what's in fashion," Lup says. "I am _way_ out of date."

"You'd look good in anything, Lulu," Taako tells her, and closes his eyes against the dizzy exhaustion, pretending that he can already feel Lup's hand on his arm for real.

*

They won. They won.

On the cusp of drifting into a restorative trance, so late at night that it's come around to early again, Taako remembers several unrelated things, disjointed with fatigue:

Static clouding his mind, and his wand hand whipping around to knock Barry from the deck of the ship while Barry begged to be killed, Taako's body instinctively understanding that request even without his memory to guide it;

Lucretia eating one of his macaroons on Candlenights, not meeting his eyes, and Taako thinking at the time, _There's a fine line between profesh and standoffish and the Director is tragically just on the wrong side_ , and Taako thinking now, _You were so fucking guilty you can't even look at me fuck you_ fuck _you_ \--

Clay wet on his fingertips, Kravitz's red-dark eyes watching him with steady attention, Taako slipping into naked honesty. "I'm worried no one else will have me," he'd said, and at the time he'd thought, _Oh shit I've never felt this comfortable with anyone, what even_ , and now he knows that there were six other people, that intimacy torn away but the feeling remaining, and now it's back they're back he's back, and Taako is too tired to know how he feels about any of this.

He resolves to shoot Kravitz a sending in the morning, and slips out of consciousness.

*

There are two versions of Taako, and one of them, on his own his whole life, might have heard Kravitz say _I love you_ and laughed, deflected, backed the fuck off, because even at the end of the world, especially at the end of the world, that's a lot. The other version of Taako, the one who'd just remembered everything -- okay, he also said the thing about Kravitz being a skull half the time, deflection instead of declaration, but ... the second version of Taako, the whole one, could hear _I love you_ and take it. There was a horrible chasm where Lup should be, and then she was back, and her return didn't just restore her, it restored _everything_. A world with Lup in it was a world Taako cared about, and wanted to save, and it was full of incredible things like super handsome reapers who could look at Taako stripped of all secrets and illusions and love him.

That first version of Taako also spent a lot of time, when there was any time between awful things happening, thinking in frankly embarrassing detail about Kravitz. So Taako owes it to every version of himself to use one of the new day's fresh spells to wind a piece of copper wire around his fingers and set his hands into position to cast the sending. "Hey, the world's saved, we're both still here, so if you're not too busy collecting souls, I said I wanted to hook up. Still do." He uses every word the spell allows, and ends it momentarily breathless. Expended spell energy, and definitely not nerves.

Almost instantaneously, Kravitz's reply flashes into his mind, his gorgeous face superimposed over the blank wall of Taako's dorm room. "On my way," Kravitz says, and, followed by a pause long enough that Taako has time to assume that's the whole message, he adds, "Right now? To the Bureau? Please send again if that time or place is bad."

Taako grins, sprawling back on his bed with his hands laced behind his head, casual enough that it doesn't really look like he's striking a pose. He waits, and a minute later a scythe tears a rend in the fabric of reality, and Kravitz steps through into the room. He's wearing an immaculate dark suit -- and Taako knows he was out tracking down wayward souls while everyone else was partying, he's probably been working all night, _how_ does he look so _good_ \-- and when he sees Taako he just stands there, looking at him like Taako is the best thing he's seen in days, weeks, years.

And, obviously, Taako is one of the best things anyone could be privileged to look upon, but the way Kravitz does it is ... so, so nice.

"Hey," Taako says, rolling onto his side and propping himself up on an elbow, bending his knee so he knows the drape of his robe is falling just so. "You arrived quick."

"I did," Kravitz agrees. "I wanted to. See you." That much is obvious; Taako has the sudden impression that Kravitz could probably just stare at him for hours and look exactly this happy about it the whole time. Which, flattering. Something more than flattering. Taako starts to feel warmer, less a blush than a glow.

"Just see me, my man?" he asks, and stretches invitingly. "This isn't just for show. You could get in on some serious touching action, too."

Kravitz does blush, a dark flush high on his cheekbones, which only makes his bone structure even more gorgeous. Taako hopes Kravitz can see how much Taako's looking at him too. This isn't a one-way admiration street. "Yeah," Kravitz says, "hang on," and rubs his hands together briskly.

Taako sits up. "If I was bothered by a little cold, I wouldn't be angling for this," he says, and Kravitz drops to his knees in front of the bed, which makes the glow inside Taako flare up with nerves and excitement, and Taako leans forward, and Kravitz tips his face up to meet him, and they're kissing.

It _is_ a little cold, Kravitz's face the temperature of someone who's just come inside from a brisk winter day, but his breath is warm and the inside of his mouth is hot and Taako is not at all bothered by the shock of contrast. Kravitz's hands hover for an uncertain moment before settling on Taako's shoulders to draw him closer as he deepens the kiss, and Taako -- Taako's already fumbling with the buttons of his suit jacket, thinking wildly that if he is _very_ careful with a burning hands spell he might be able to turn their clothes to ash without singeing either of them.

Kravitz doesn't move to help him. He threads his fingers in Taako's hair and kisses Taako with thorough, knee-weakening concentration, like he doesn't even need to breathe -- which he probably _doesn't_ , Taako realizes, feeling lightheaded.

"Why," Taako pulls back to say breathlessly, "are we not naked, this is ridiculous, I've been waiting forever here--"

Kravitz grins at him, a look of such pure affectionate delight that Taako almost has to look away. "That's no reason to rush it," Kravitz tells him, and sets his cool fingers to work undressing Taako, carefully, without any indication of the fumbling urgency Taako's feeling. He unbuttons Taako's tunic, slides his hands up under the shirt beneath while Taako shivers and raises his arms obligingly so Kravitz can pull it off. He unlaces Taako's breeches, and by now Taako is shaking a little, in a way that would be embarrassing if he weren't feeling so eager.

He's never been ... unwrapped, like this, like he's a gift, like he's worth Kravitz taking all the time in the world on.

Kravitz's fingers catch on Taako's lacy underwear, and he gives a surprised huff of laughter. Taako opens his mouth to say something about how he was going to wear those anyway, this isn't a special occasion thing, but what actually comes out is, "Please keep going."

"I'd like to--" Kravitz starts, questioningly, his thumbs hooking on Taako's underwear and tugging gently, and Taako says, "Literally anything you want to do right now is a great idea, my dude," and Kravitz laughs, settling down between Taako's legs. Taako lifts his hips, wiggling out of his underwear, and Kravitz sets his hands (now, surprisingly, a little warmer) on Taako's thighs, leaning forward to kiss the head of Taako's dick. Taako twitches and laughs and says, "Yeah, more of that would be--" before his words dissolve into a strangled noise as Kravitz slides his mouth down over Taako's cock, taking it deep enough that Taako feels the head hit the back of Kravitz's throat.

Fuck, Kravitz doesn't need to _breathe_ , Taako remembers dizzily.

Kravitz pulls off, a long slow slide, then back down again, and Taako moans helplessly. He pets at Kravitz's locs, making involuntarily wordless encouraging sounds, unable to do anything else, Kravitz's hands on his thighs anchoring him. The heat curling up in his gut is already so much. Kravitz bobs his head, throat working, still taking Taako relentlessly deep because apparently being the avatar of death comes with absurd sexual perks. Taako's legs begin to shake, and he can't even feel sorry for how quickly this is about to be over, because it's so, so good, and -- Kravitz pulls off again, all the way this time, looking up at Taako with his eyes literally glowing. He's still fully clothed, but his suit is starting to look wavery around the edges. Taako takes several deep breaths, trying to collect the wonderful scatter of his thoughts, trying to find coherence in all this _want_ , and manages, "Come here, babe."

Kravitz comes to his feet, a little unsteady, and rolls Taako over on the ridiculous tiny dormitory bed. As he does, his entire suit dissolves into wisps and curls of dark mist, blowing away in tatters and leaving Kravitz completely naked atop Taako.

"Good trick," Taako says, laughing, flattered, suspecting that this was less a deliberate choice on Kravitz's part than sheer inability to concentrate enough to keep his clothes. Kravitz is hard against Taako's hip, and it's _warm_. "How does your circulation even work, it seems kind of arbitrary," Taako adds, touching Kravitz's dick curiously, and Kravitz presses his face into Taako's shoulder, keening softly. Taako immediately forgets every logistical question he has about sleeping with Death in favor of giving Kravitz's dick a more deliberate stroke, and is rewarded by Kravitz making another quiet desperate sound. With his free hand he cups Kravitz's jaw, turning his face, and kisses the taste of himself from Kravitz's mouth, swallowing more of Kravitz's soft hungry noises.

"Taako," Kravitz says against his lips, sounding charmingly breathless for someone who doesn't breathe, "I really -- what do you want, I want to do anything you--"

"Oh, same," Taako agrees giddily. He thinks of the thorough, deliberate way Kravitz has approached all of this, and all the things he's imagined doing with Kravitz since they last saw one another. "I really need you to fuck me, like, immediately."

Kravitz shudders. "Yes," he says, "please, I'd -- I'd love that--"

Taako prepared a grease spell this morning in the optimistic hope that things might go this way. He's certainly not the first wizard to come up with the smaller, specialized variant meant for the bedroom rather than combat, but his version is fast and elegant and not particularly messy, so he casts it with a flourish. "Check it," he says, catching hold of Kravitz's hand. Kravitz presses a cautious finger into him, and Taako bears down -- yeah, still got it, he calculated the spell perfectly. "Okay," Taako says, only breathing a little unsteadily, "we're good to go."

But Kravitz takes his _time_. He holds Taako's legs open, idly stroking Taako's dick with one hand while he twists his finger, adds a second, stretches them experimentally, paying a close careful attention to every twitch and whimper he draws from Taako. Taako probably should have anticipated this -- wasn't he just thinking that he enjoyed the thorough, deliberate way Kravitz approaches things? A whine rises in Taako's throat, and he's almost swallowed it when Kravitz curls his fingers and the noise turns into a wail, Taako arching off the bed. "Krav," he pants, "c'mon, please, you're _killing_ me--"

"No, I decided not to do that," Kravitz tells him, laughter in his voice, and continues opening Taako up with enough agonizing slowness that Taako is a quivering mess by the time Kravitz deigns to remove his fingers and press his cock into Taako instead. (It's still warm, Kravitz's circulation is so _weird_ , Taako is feeling kind of delirious.) He hooks his legs over Kravitz's shoulders, making himself comfortable against the pillows, and _comfortable_ immediately becomes _mindblowing_ when Kravitz leans forward to kiss him, bending Taako neatly in half and deepening the angle of his thrusts. Taako meets the kiss open-mouthed and messy, trying to pull Kravitz even closer using only his ankles as leverage, which is a sex-addled thing to do and not very effective. It doesn't matter: Kravitz takes Taako's wrists in one hand, pinning them to the pillow above his head, and kisses him again, moving in Taako with the kind of steady stamina that makes Taako start shaking with the wonderful realization that he's going to be _relentless_ about this.

It's hands-down the best fucking hookup of Taako's entire very long life, and when Taako comes he sees _stars_. He keeps kissing Kravitz, dazed and happy, until Kravitz makes a faint broken noise, which sounds surprised more than anything, and shudders still. Rather than collapsing atop Taako, Kravitz slumps half next to him, most of his weight on a pillow, because Kravitz is the most considerate person Taako has taken to bed possibly ever. 

It's incredible. It's the best. It's worth fighting off the Hunger just for the chance to do this. 

Taako discovers that he wants to do it again and again. He wants to memorize every inch of Kravitz. He wants to experiment with all the ways Kravitz's skin warms up under his touch. "I want to do that again," Taako tells him, a little slurry with endorphins, pressing a kiss to Kravitz's shoulder.

"Me too," Kravitz says. Taako can hear the smile in his voice.

For a time, Taako drifts. Even pressed against his side, Kravitz's skin goes steadily cooler, and after a time, Kravitz considerately reaches down to pull a blanket over both of them. He combs his fingers through Taako's hair, and traces the points of Taako's ears, which makes Taako shiver pleasantly. "Hey, Taako," Kravitz says at length.

"Hmm?"

"How ... how would you feel about Lup and Barry working with me?"

That brings Taako back to full consciousness. Kravitz had said they'd have to talk about his sister, and they do have a history of talking Kravitz's business in the middle of dates (or, well, going on sneaky dates when Kravitz has come to talk business, so turnabout is fair play) -- but there's something gentle in Kravitz's voice, like he's aware that the sound of Lup's name is still a press against a tender spot. Taako feels raw.

"Like, as reapers?" Taako asks.

"Yeah." Kravitz shifts to a more comfortable position, his arm curled around Taako. "Or, well, I hope so. I'm planning to petition my Lady on their behalf, but before I did that, I -- I wanted to make sure that would be an acceptable solution. For you, and for them."

"Hey, anything where they don't end up in the Eternal Stockade for bein' liches sounds like a good solution to me, my man." Taako takes a deep breath. "Also, I bet Lup would have a blast running around reaping wayward souls." He presses a little closer against Kravitz's side, and says quietly, "Thanks, babe."

"Of course," Kravitz murmurs, pressing a kiss to Taako's hair. Taako squeezes his eyes shut. The afterglow has been replaced by something less languid but no less lovely. He lets Kravitz hold him, and enjoys the feeling of being in his arms.

*

 _I want to do that again_.

Taako lays on his back, mid-afternoon light slowly creeping across the coverlet, and holds the two halves of his life up against one another, now that the giddy rush of victory has faded. In any timeline, that probably would have been the best hookup of his life. In either, he probably would have said that aloud, running his mouth in the aftermath of pleasure. In this one--

(even at the end of the world, _I love you_ is a lot)

(and Lup's return restored everything)

\--Taako find that he means it.

*

Once the last remnants of the post-Hunger celebration are cleaned up, Lucretia summons her family to the central audience chamber of the Bureau of Balance. She tells them that she wants to set them up with funds from the Bureau. "Of course I want to direct most of the Bureau's resources towards helping communities recover from the Hunger's attack," Lucretia says, "but offering some to you seemed the least I could do, after ... everything."

"You don't need to do anything for us," Magnus tells her gently. "There's nothing to forgive. But I was thinking of going into dog-training, if you wanted to invest in that?"

Lucretia blinks, the only giveaway of how startled she is by this pronouncement. "I would be honored to."

"I'll take some money," Merle says. "Not for me, really. For my kids."

"I was thinking of buying a boat," Davenport puts in. He gives Lucretia a piercing look. "And you owe me a _lot_ of back pay."

"I do," Lucretia agrees, on a watery laugh. She won't quite meet Davenport's eyes, but she does have the beginnings of a smile on her face.

"And I told you, babe, already forgotten," Lup says. "Barry and I might have a new thing going on soon, but Taako promised to take me shopping, so sure, I'll use some money for that."

At his name, Taako stops pretending to inspect his nails and looks up. Everyone is watching him expectantly. He looks Lucretia right in the face. "I don't need anything," he says. "You've done enough."

*

When they were young, one of Taako and Lup's favorite scams was the alibi swap. One of them would do something visibly innocent in a public place, while the other pickpocketed, or dealt rigged hands of cards, or straight up heisted some sucker's house. (This was also in the days before they'd perfected mage hand and minor illusions, all the small magical tricks that made their hustles that much easier.) Then whoever had committed a felony laid low for a while, and if the other one got caught by whoever they'd hustled, well, how could I possibly have been in two places at once, Officer?

At fourteen, sitting on the banks of a river trying and so far failing to catch any fish, Lup tells Taako that she's a girl.

"Cool," says Taako.

" _Really_ cool?" Lup asks. Her shoulders are tight, like she's waiting for Taako to drop her the way their aunt had, or something equally insane. Taako can't find it in himself to be offended by that. Maybe Lup thinks he thinks she's goofing, and is playing along with the bit, but Lup is everything, and he can tell when she's being serious.

"Super cool," Taako says, knocking his shoulder against hers. "Like, if you expand your wardrobe, hell yes I am stealing all of your skirts, already lookin' forward to it."

"We won't be able to do the alibi swap anymore, though," Lup says, addressing her feet, like that has been weighing on her, like maybe she was letting the team down by striking that one from their repertoire.

"Your hair has been longer than mine for ages," Taako says. "We haven't done the alibi swap in like a year. That's what you're worried about, dingus?"

"Shit, no," Lup says, lacing her fingers with his. "That was a test, obvs."

Taako holds his sister's hand, and thinks that word a few times, _sister_. It feels new, of course, but it also feels easy, because anything that makes Lup happy is the easiest thing there is. _I have a twin sister_ , Taako thinks, and it feels exactly the same as it always has, the two of them together against the world.

( _I have a twin sister_ , Taako thinks, Junior's ichor still bitter on his tongue, a lifetime of memories coming into his head in a deluge, and he's shaking with fury before he has any other conscious thought.)

("We're gonna become liches," Lup says, and she looks calm but her shoulders are tight, like she knows that nothing else she's ever told Taako about herself is as scary. And it is, it's terrifying, it's -- Taako feels almost disembodied with fear, listening through a ringing in his ears as Lup explains that her emotions for him are going to be one of the only things anchoring her to her sense of self. He manages to respond to her in an almost-normal voice, manages to stop his hands from shaking the way his legs are, and of course Lup knows, but she also knows he's trying. Anything that makes Lup happy. Anything.)

Sometimes, on the nights the towns he travels through for _Sizzle It Up With Taako_ are large enough to have a decent inn, Taako catches his reflection in a mirror and feels a weird vertigo. He expects the face in the glass to have a different hairstyle, painted carmine lips curving into a different smile. On those nights, Taako stares into the mirror until he can recognize the face as his own again. It doesn't happen often, and it doesn't mean anything, and it doesn't make him avoid mirrors -- a good compact is necessary if he wants his eyeliner to be on point -- but it does usually prompt him to switch up his style. Keep the brand fresh, that's all.

*

Taako doesn't stay on the moon base. One more day of looking at the campus where he spent a year stupidly trusting Lucretia, and he might scream. Also, everyone at the Bureau of Balance knows Taako is a hero, natch, but he's had their applause every time he and Merle and Magnus retrieved another artifact; he's depriving everyone in the world below of the chance to admire him.

Barry insists on hosting him, in the pleasant two-story clapboard house he owns on the outskirts of Neverwinter. The kitchen is decent, and Taako could use a month or two to get back on his feet and be close to his sister, so he says yes.

"That looks so good," Lup says, on their second night in their new home, drifting into the kitchen to peer over Taako's shoulder at the pot he has simmering on the stove. It's a beef stew in red wine sauce, whipped up in a fit of nostalgia for all the truly bizarre stews Taako attempted over their hundred-year journey, and it does look good, and smells even better. 

"Thanks," Taako says. "If you -- when you can eat again, you tell me exactly what you want and I'll make it for you. I'll make it better than you've ever had in your life. Lives? Existence."

Lup laughs, settling into a chair, the crackle of her energy muted with contentment. "I'll make a whole list and let you surprise me."

"Perfect," Taako says, turning the heat down on the stove. He already has a list in his head too, of all Lup's favorites, but he wants to get it exactly right.

"Hey, Taako," Lup says. "Kravitz talked to the Raven Queen on me and Barry's behalf, and -- well, it sounds like we're gonna be reapers."

"Nice." Taako checks the pot one more time and, satisfied, comes to sit down at the table with Lup, content to let it continue simmering for a while. "You cool with that?"

"Oh yeah," Lup says. "Badass gig in service of the Goddess of Death? Hunting down wayward souls? That would be a fun job even if it wasn't the alternative to punishment or imprisonment." A skeletal hand drums an absent beat against the tabletop. "Besides ... a lot of what Fisher and Junior did for us, broadcasting everything, was good -- really, _really_ good -- giving everyone hope and understanding. But me and Barry, Taako, we're liches and we're heroes and it might send a lot of ambitious people down a path that no one should take unless they really have to." Her hand clenches into a fist, crackling for a moment with energy before she controls it. "I don't regret my choice, at all, but this is also our mess to clean up, you know?"

"Yeah," Taako says. He wishes he could hold her hand, wants it enough that it feels like a pressure around his heart. She's always the one who looks clear-eyed at the consequences, and accepts them, and sometimes makes them something beautiful. "Hey. I'm happy for you."

"Me too," Lup says. "But, uh, I have to ask. Is it going to be weird, me being coworkers with Kravitz?"

"Probably not weirder than when you and Barold started dating," Taako says, which is no kind of answer at all, because Lup and Barry had known each other a _lifetime_ by then, and Taako met Kravitz this year, and if he's drawing parallels, they're useless, because it's still so new. "Seriously," Taako says, "don't sweat it."

"Okay," Lup says, her head tilted, as though she can sense a little of Taako's thoughts, and is waiting for the rest.

Well, fuck it.

"Lup," Taako says, "he loves me."

A silence draws out between them. Lup's cowled figure is unreadable not because Taako doesn't have experience reading her lich expressions now, but because in flesh Lup would be wearing her unreadable face, perfectly neutral as she considers. "And?" Lup asks finally.

"Yeah," Taako says, his outward breath a little shuddery. "Me too, I think."

*

Taako's romantic history is one of deliberate uncomplication. Sure, in university he hooked up with some other students -- and, on one memorable occasion, the associate professor of the School of Evocation -- but he was much more focused on his mastery of transmutation than on pursuing a relationship. Then came the IPRE, and, well. It was wonderful that Lup and Barry found one another, and Taako loved them all dearly, his whole family, but aside from one drunken late-night kiss in one of the earlier cycles, which he and Magnus unanimously declared A Terrible Idea Let's Never Do That Again, he wasn't interested in being anything other than platonic with them. On some of the worlds they visited, someone might show an interest in Taako, but if he reciprocated, he'd try to leave soon after. Forming attachments, knowing what was going to happen -- no. And when his memories were taken, Taako was on the road, not wanting to be tied down to anyone. When his memories were taken, Taako didn't ... have room, somehow, in the hollow center of himself, for anything to fit in the place of what had been torn away.

He'd meant Kravitz to be a casual fling. A dare to himself, kind of: hey, this incredibly handsome literal avatar of death tried to kill you, when you talk him out of it you could also try to talk him into bed. And then--

_I love you, Taako, and at this point, I think that everyone in reality is going to love you after hearing your story, and nothing's gonna change that_

\--then he hadn't been hollow anymore, and when the power pours out of him and the planes reconnect and Kravitz appears in the center of the black-glass ruin of Phandalin, Taako feels cracked open with relief and joy. It's how he felt seeing Lup again. It's how he felt standing with his family and _knowing_ them again. And Taako doesn't even think, he's already running to Kravitz, he's already pulling Kravitz's cold hands away from his face to kiss him, because he--

"Me too, I think," Taako says to his sister, and breathes through the surprise of saying it aloud and making it real.

*

The first month of Taako's new life is ... good. He has the house to himself, most days, while Barry and Lup are off learning their new duties. Sometimes Kravitz comes by to meet them, not because either of them haven't immediately learned the knack of cutting their way between dimensions, but simply because it gives Kravitz an excuse to sample whatever breakfast Taako has made for himself and Barry, and to give Taako a kiss on his way back through the portal. Taako experiments with recipes, and considers how to best take advantage of the new universality of the Taako brand, and sometimes goes into Neverwinter to see and be seen. Once, he goes specifically to visit Merle, who is in the middle of setting up the plans for some sort of insane child kidnapping program he's calling Extreme Teen Adventures. Merle's kids are really cute, as kids go, but Taako already has one Ango to care about, and after an afternoon wandering the main thoroughfare eating ice cream, Taako gives the kids some sticky hugs and excuses himself. 

On a bright summer day, as gorgeous as any of the others in the past month, Taako wanders out mid-morning in an embroidered silk robe to get the mail. He sees a letterhead crest, _Office of the Sheriff of Glamour Springs_ , and his hands tremble breaking the wax seal. The letter inside is written in polite, straightforward language: Sazed has surrendered himself to the Glamour Springs village court, confessing to the poisoning of the town, apparently moved to contrition by the story the voidfish broadcast. The letter grants Taako a full pardon.

Taako stands in the balmy sunlight, clutching the letter, surprised. He's so relieved. He's existed on a hundred worlds, and he's known for months that the poisoning of Glamour Springs wasn't even his fault, and he's still so, so relieved to be holding this pardon.

Good for the brand, obviously.

He spends the rest of the morning in a buoyant mood, inventorying the kitchen, humming snatches of Lup and Barry's duet from the Legato Conservatory cycle. Around noon there's a knock at the door, and when Taako opens it, Ren is on the other side, looking nervous. 

Wordlessly she holds out a plate with a single profiterole on it. At a glance, Taako can tell it has some kind of transmutation enchantment on it.

"What's this?" Taako asks, blinking at her.

"Well, this is, uh," Ren says, still holding out the plate. "This is a job application, I guess, Taako."

"Okay." Taako picks up the profiterole. "Let me give it a whirl."

He eats it. It's fucking delicious, and as he chews and swallows it, he feels magically warmed. The enchantment is subtle, perfectly complimentary to the bake. Taako gives a hum of surprised approval around his mouthful, and Ren's face breaks into a relieved grin. 

She sets the empty plate down on the porch railing, and reaches into the bag she has slung over her shoulder, explaining, "I want to show you somethin'." She pulls out a roll of parchment, and she spreads it out right there on the floor of the porch. Taako, still swallowing the last of the glorious profiterole, looks down at it.

There are blueprints. There's the outline of a business plan. There are logos and other beautifully rendered pieces of graphic design. _Taako's Amazing School of Magic_ , the parchment reads, in glorious flourishes, Ren making Taako's bullshit promise from the Refuge loops into something with the possibility of becoming real.

"I don't know if you've heard," Ren says, "but Refuge has had kind of a -- a windfall since the Story and Song. And we've all seen our fair share of prosperity and I recently came into a decent chunk of change myself and ... I thought of the perfect place to put it." She pauses, and produces a big diamond from her bag, setting it down atop the parchment. There's a wonderfully understated theatricality to the whole thing. "This is a gift," Ren tells Taako, "no strings attached, okay, but -- I was hoping maybe -- I could be your lieutenant?"

Taako looks at her earnest face. He thinks of the letter from Glamour Springs, of the way Sazed used to look at him, as admiringly and earnestly as Ren is looking at him now, but hungrier. Ren would never--

"I -- I know things didn't work out last time that you kinda set out on your own with a small business," Ren says, as though reading his mind, "but I promise, I won't let you down. I could help you make something really amazing. But I just -- more importantly, I -- I saw you be a _hero_ , Taako, and you were amazing, and I just think you'd be real good at this and I think the world deserves to ... to see what you can do."

Taako finds his voice. "On this we are agreed," he says, and she still looks so hopeful, and Taako looks down at the blueprints, thinks of having his own place on these hypothetical school grounds, somewhere Kravitz can stop in and kiss him silly without Barry or Lup wandering by. He thinks of how he really believes Lup is real now, how he's seen her every day and the fear is starting to drain out of him. He thinks of the letter from Glamour Springs and the lightness in his heart. 

"I love this," Taako says. "I should mention my boyfriend is Death, so he will be staying over from time to time. But if you're comfortable with that, I -- Ren, I--" For a moment his voice fails him again. "It would be my honor."

Ren's face glows. She reaches out her hand for a handshake, and Taako takes it, grinning, so, so relieved.

*

Magnus helps turn Ren's blueprints into their final architectural design, and Carey and Killian recommend Taako one of the construction crews the Bureau has been using in their efforts to rebuild. There are only three buildings that go up in the initial construction: the complex of classrooms, the student dormitory, and a headmaster's suite for Taako. Ren takes care of hiring instructors, though all prospective professors get vetted by Taako. Ren takes care of designing student brochures, and calculating tuition prices and instructor salaries, and planning the curriculum. She still runs everything by Taako, but her competence is obvious, and within a month Taako trusts her judgment completely.

(That's still terrifying; he trusted Sazed. Taako sometimes feels hot and cold and hot again, remembering how casually he trusted Sazed. Once, shortly before the school opens, Taako takes Ren's shoulders and looks deeply into her eyes and asks, "Do you feel like you're getting enough credit for this, Ren?" Ren just blinks at him, looking surprised at the question, and says, "Taako, this is my _dream_." Taako makes sure that her name is prominently displayed on their brochures and letterheads, Assistant Headmistress Ren, but it's gratitude, not insurance.)

Taako's Amazing School of Magic is, of course, an instant success. Attendance is high, and remains high even after Taako decides to institute dueling as a way to settle everything from student disputes to class rankings. Most of the students hate that policy, which is fucking hilarious, and also weeds out the ones who wouldn't have made it anyway. Taako teaches Advanced Culinary Transmutation twice a week, and holds informal aphorism seminars on weekend afternoons. 

The best part is the headmaster's suite. Barry's house is nice, but Taako never stopped feeling like a guest, or like he could make any space besides the kitchen his own. At the school, Taako drapes his rooms in gauzy fabrics, stocks his kitchen with high-end cookware, fills nooks and shelves with tchotchkes sent by friends and admirers. He considers going to his old room on the _Starblaster_ and bringing over all the artwork that he accumulated there, but every sketch and watercolor and acrylic is a Lucretia original, so -- no. Instead he commissions local artists to give him their best renderings of the Day of Story and Song, and ends up with a pretty fucking excellent new collection.

None of his reaper fam have much time to visit during the school's building phase, but he invites them for the grand opening, along with the rest of the _Starblaster_ crew, and a blanket invitation for the Bureau. Angus is off at Lucas's far inferior school, but plenty of other familiar faces from the Bureau are in attendance, and of the crew, only Davenport sends his regrets -- he's halfway around the world, but he wishes Taako the best of luck with the school, and signs his letter, as always, _joyfully yours_. Ren glows through the entire ceremony, and Taako manages to make his gracious rounds with the guests without once interacting directly with Lucretia, and everything goes extremely well.

"This is amazing," Lup tells him, lingering after most of the guests have gone. Taako can hear the smile in her voice, even if she still doesn't have a face to smile with, although according to Barry, the clone should be done forming in a month or two. "Can I come guest lecture?"

"Oh hell yeah," Taako says. "I'm planning to make the students duel for everything, so yeah, let's get some fireballs up in there."

Lup laughs long and hard, in a way that in her physical form would have ended with her curled up on the ground, clutching her belly with tears in her eyes from mirth. "Oh, I can't _wait_ ," Lup says.

Kravitz stays the night of the grand opening, wandering through Taako's suite of rooms touching fabric with absent fingers, smiling at the decorations. "I like this," he says. "It feels like you."

"Where do you live?" Taako asks. "Like, I assumed it's on the Astral Plane, but maybe you have a nice house somewhere and you've been holding out on me."

"No," Kravitz says, laughing, "no, it's -- I have a place on the Astral Plane. I'm sorry I haven't invited you over yet, it's ... kind of weird, for mortals. I mean, it's -- it was appointed to me by the Raven Queen, it was never a place I was meant to be while I was alive, but it's nice, I guess? If you're a reaper? I could probably make it presentable for you."

Lup can't laugh until she cries and Kravitz has an unknowable abode as Death and Taako feels suddenly irritated with all of it. "Why is everyone I love dead?" he complains, the words out of his mouth before he has a chance to consider them, and immediately regrets it when he sees the look that crosses Kravitz's face, soft and compassionate. Taako has had the grave misfortune -- haha, grave -- to fall for someone who actually listens to what he says and takes him seriously.

"I know we don't really, uh, live by mortal rules," Kravitz says, "but we're dead and we're still here."

"I don't live by mortal rules either," Taako says brightly. "It's no big deal, babe."

Kravitz is still looking at him as though he can _see_ him, and, more alarmingly, as though when he looks at Taako he can somehow see the best version of him, whatever that is. All he says, though, is "Well, we're here now, and I ... I haven't seen the bedroom yet, have I?"

"You have _not_ ," Taako agrees with enthusiasm, and drags Kravitz to bed.

*

Sometimes he misses traveling with just Merle and Magnus. Sometimes he misses rolling his eyes and standing nonchalantly in a doorway while Magnus rushed into danger and Merle paged frantically through his Extreme Teen Bible looking for a spell to help them, neither of them noticing that Taako had already figured out three solutions to their problem that didn't involve hitting it with an axe or a prayer. They didn't _expect_ anything from him. Sometimes, horribly, he misses the version of himself bounded into only one world, the version of himself that was solitary, the version that didn't try to do anything if he didn't see what was in it for him. The world cracked open and became infinite and sometimes Taako misses the time when no one expected him to be _better_.

Kravitz looks at Taako and sees the best version of him, which is probably the one who had companionship and love for a hundred years, except that somehow Kravitz saw that in him even before Taako remembered any of it. Clay wet on his fingertips, Kravitz asking him _Why are you doing this, Taako?_ and when Taako says _I'm worried no one else will have me_ something in Kravitz's face shifts, somewhere between surprise and respect, like he heard another answer under it, like even then he understood things about Taako that Taako himself had forgotten. 

*

The school is running smoothly enough under Ren's guidance that Taako takes to the road again, arranging appearances in all the major cities, offering demonstrations and Taako-brand cookware and, after a few months of intense sketching with Lup's occasional input, the first pieces of clothing in the Taako fashion line as well. Everything is a hit, of course.

Taako still makes the time to return to the Amazing School of Magic to teach his own twice-weekly class. Two months after the school's opening, Taako heads back to his suite after Advanced Culinary Transmutation lets out for lunch, and freezes in the doorway. There's someone standing in the middle of his living room, slender, exactly his own height, turning at the sound of the door in a swirl of skirts.

"Lup," Taako croaks.

She launches herself at him, hair flying out behind her, a huge grin on her face, and slams bodily into Taako. Her arms are solid, squeezing the air from his lungs, and Taako doesn't care, he's never cared less about anything, he's never hugged anyone harder than he's hugging his sister now.

"Good to be back," Lup says, still grinning hard enough that it must be hurting her face. Her _face_. Taako drinks it in, so like his own in the mirror, so different when Lup is the one wearing it. "You planning on letting me go anytime soon?"

"No," Taako tells her happily, tightening his arms around her. "You're gonna be trapped like this forever." Then he remembers that it's lunchtime, that Lup can _eat_ , and immediately lets her go. "We have to eat! What do you want?"

"Everything," Lup says fervently. "Seriously, Taako, anything you want to make would be perfect."

"You should have told me you were coming," Taako says, smacking her arm. "I would've made you your favorite turkey recipe." Lup doesn't look remotely contrite. "Okay," Taako mutters, "I can probably whip up _something_ here."

His hands are shaking with excitement, so he makes Lup sous chef for him, slicing the onions for the soup he decides on, and the vegetables for the side salad. The soup's beef broth is conjured, because he doesn't have beef stock in the house, which he could have done if Lup had given him any _warning_ , but -- it doesn't matter, Lup's right, anything right now would be perfect.

They eat lunch with their sides pressed together, sitting on the same side of the table because Taako refuses to go any further away than that. It's absolutely different from the last time they saw one another, and also exactly the same. Taako tells her what's new with the school, and Lup tells him about the Reap Squad's latest bounty, a necromancer over near Rockport. They talk about the rest of the family's latest news -- Davenport seems to be having a blast exploring the world on his boat, Magnus has had great success raising a deerhound puppy he's named Johann, Merle has vanished into the woods with the children he kidnapped -- and into a comfortable pause, Lup takes a deep breath and says, "Talk to Lucretia."

Taako flinches.

"I get why you're angry," Lup says gently. "I really do get it, but -- Taako, how can you forgive her if you never talk to her?"

"How did you forgive her at _all_?" Taako demands, grinding the heels of his hands into his eyes. "Lup, I -- if there's ever a point at which I have to work with her professionally, sure, no problemo, but other than that, I -- _no_. No. She took -- everything that made me _me_ , and I -- I didn't know how to be anything else, and how do you _forgive_ that?"

"I don't know," Lup admits, her hand curling around Taako's wrist, just holding, present, solid, _alive_ , his heart, his heart. "I don't think she knows, either. And if ... if it's not worth it to you, I won't ask again. But I think it might be good for both of you to at least try."

"Maybe," Taako murmurs, and leans against her, breathing in tandem. He thinks about forgiveness, about pardons, about sacrifice, about what it feels like to be whole. 

*

_Why am I always the only pragmatist with you people?_

Everyone else is always thinking with their hearts, Magnus hugging Lucretia without hesitation, Merle looking like he wants to join in but thought better of it at the last second after considering awkward height differences, even Lup offering her forgiveness. Lup had twelve years to gather up all the threads of herself and meditate in the silent dark, drawing from her endless well of compassion. Taako had nothing.

If he'd been thinking with his heart, he would have hexed Lucretia where she stood. But he grit his teeth and modulated his voice to something below a scream and did what he needed to do to save the world, because what he felt _didn't matter_.

"Talk to Lucretia," Lup says, and Taako would do anything for her, anything, so--

So he goes back to the Bureau, which is _of Benevolence_ now, does Lucretia realize how ominous that sounds? She means well and renamed her Bureau something so benign it comes around to threatening, and isn't that just Lucretia all the way down. 

The moon base looks almost exactly the same as it did months ago, when Taako was last here. Avi is still there to greet him, asking how the Amazing School of Magic is doing, raving about the excellent vest he bought from Taako's clothing line, chatting happily about how successful he's been at spearheading the relocation efforts for communities displaced by fighting the Hunger. Taako makes the right noises in response, less and less attention paid to Avi the closer they come to Lucretia's office.

"It's really great to see you, Taako," Avi says, coming to a halt at the door, and Taako manages, "Yeah, you too, my dude," before Avi raps on the door, and Lucretia's voice calls, "Come in," and Taako is suddenly alone in a room with Lucretia for the first time since -- since--

He hasn't been alone with her since the _Starblaster_ , has he.

Lucretia is sitting at her desk, looking up at Taako, a smile frozen on her face. She really does wear being the Director well, turning her innate quiet awkwardness into something approaching gravitas. And the past few months have obviously been good to her: the lines of tension around her eyes have smoothed out, and the smile she's wearing looked like it was genuine before she realized Taako is the one standing at her door. She recovers quickly, too, the smile only wavering into shock for a moment before she laces her hands in front of her and says, "Taako. What can I do for you?"

Taako didn't actually prepare anything for this meeting -- no offensive spells, as much as he was tempted to, and no specific words, either. Fuck it. "Yeah, I'm wondering that too," Taako says. "I'm here because my sister thought we should have a chat -- you remember my sister? Lup, great hair, pyrotechnics, best person I know? -- and oh yeah, she was _gone_ , she was out of my head for _years_ , so ... want to workshop this with me? What can you _possibly_ do?"

Lucretia takes a shuddering breath. Taako is startled to see tears in her eyes. Lucretia lied to his face for a year without any visible signs of distress, but maybe he just didn't have the context to read her the way he used to. She looks ... she looks the way she did when they rematerialized aboard the ship after the Judges killed them: wrung out, desperately grateful to no longer be alone.

"I don't know," Lucretia says. "I -- I didn't realize how badly -- Merle started a family, and Magnus won a revolution, and you ... you seemed happy with your show, I thought I'd set you all up the best I could, and I'm sorry none of it worked out--"

"No," Taako says, quiet and steady. "Taako two-point-oh was just fine. You did a much better job with the three of us than you did with, say, Barry? Locking him out for years and making everyone think he was evil? Or Davenport, whose literal _entire personality_ you wiped? Or Lup, who you _never found_? All that is _much_ worse. We both know they're all better people than I am. But I'm a petty bitch, so you're gonna have to do a lot more for me to consider forgiving you."

A corner of Lucretia's mouth twitches back up towards a smile. "Did you know, Davenport's written me a letter almost every week?" she says. "The first dozen or so were all inventories of the ways I'd betrayed our family. He also had a lot of suggestions for how to run the Bureau more effectively. I -- I think it was good for him to work through it that way."

"I bet that sucked a lot less than me freezing you out," Taako says. Lucretia grimaces acknowledgment. "I really could have kept that up for years," Taako adds. "Fuckin' decades, probably. I'm not going to write you my feelings until I'm less angry."

"I wouldn't expect that," Lucretia agrees. She clears her throat. "What -- what do you need? Is there anything I can do to make this right?"

 _Yeah, fucking apologize_ , Taako thinks, and doesn't say aloud. She's never going to say _I'm sorry I did this to all of you_ , because how do you take something back when it all worked out in the end, better than you could have ever hoped? She's never going to apologize, because there's no way she can even come close to making it up to them. The worst part is, Taako gets that. Lucretia turns out to have been the real pragmatist all along. Taako gets that, gets accepting your own terribleness and embracing it, except Lucretia never really got the hang of it, because she's looking at Taako with tears in her eyes. She did what she thought was necessary, and the whole time she could feel the way she was hurting them.

And Taako--

*

Everyone became close during the century aboard the _Starblaster_. It was unavoidable: the world was terrible, impossible, _unreal_. No one else was real, only the seven of them. That could have become a horror, but instead it became ... it became Taako teaching Barry how to swim; Merle staying up half the night with him inventing names for new constellations; Magnus spending long hot afternoons sitting in the shade under riverside trees, keeping Taako company while he waited to catch strange fish; Davenport pranking him with ever-more-elaborate illusions; Lucretia painting beautiful vistas and helping Taako hang them up around the walls of his cabin. The place in Taako's heart that was reserved for Taako-and-Lup expanded to encompass all of them, unexpected but entirely welcome.

 _This could be enough_ , Taako thinks, in the brief moments he has to consider it.

In the final cycle, as the world below falls into the madness of the Relic Wars, Barry stares out the ship's window at the deceptively quiet dark below. "I would feel guilty being a citizen in a world that I ... poisoned," he says. "I don't know how you shut yourself off from that."

 _How do you_ not? Taako wonders, and what comes out of his mouth is, "I'm sorry, but I've been living a hundred years with me and one year with millions of people, interchangeable. I guess I just got to a point where ... _I_ was the one that I could focus on, because, everybody else that I ever met, aside from the six of you, were dust. They were just talking _dust_ , okay, so I started worrying a lot more about me, because what was the fuckin' point?"

Barry just _stares_ at him, like he can't believe Taako could say something like that. Like somehow, to him, _every_ world has been real.

Some things only gain context in retrospect. At the beginning of the eighteenth cycle, Taako wanders in on Lucretia sitting in the _Starblaster_ 's rec room, sketching the miniaturized crystal full of robotic souls. It's on the last page of the notebook she was using when she and Merle collected the history of that world from the robots. She looks up and gives Taako a tired smile.

"I'm gonna have to conjure you some more notebooks soon, huh," Taako says.

"I really did think I'd brought more than enough," Lucretia says on a laugh. The crystal glows softly between them. "I -- I'm glad we were able to take them with us. The robots, I mean, not the notebooks. We ... did the right thing, didn't we?"

"Sure," Taako says. "Like, the alternatives were destroying the crystal or letting the Hunger eat all of it, so ... yeah, that was a good third option, I'd say we did the right thing."

Lucretia stares into the crystal for a long moment. "All those souls might just be asleep in there, forever," she says. "It's ... We saved them from suffering, and death, or -- or whatever it is that the Hunger does when it consumes a world. Being asleep, that has to be better than the Hunger."

"Oh, for sure," Taako agrees, his mind already wandering. Ethical debates are boring, especially now that every world is so transitory. But he sees the look on Lucretia's face, like she's just realized all over again that all of their options are bad and she doesn't know how to handle it. Taako rolls his eyes and gets to his feet, coming over to stand behind her chair, and puts his arms around her, propping his chin atop the coarse softness of her hair. She leans back into the embrace. "I got you," Taako murmurs. "It's good. We did good."

*

\--Taako never really got the hang of embracing his own terrible pragmatism either, no matter how hard he pretends he did. He looks at Lucretia, sitting behind her Director's desk, unable to apologize, _Is there anything I can do to make this right_ , and she's -- she's one of the only people who ever felt real, until the day she cut them all from Taako's heart and made him into someone else. There are two versions of Taako, and one of them, on his own his whole life, also believed in one solid, real world. That version of Taako was never the only real person, drifting through a sea of future ghosts. Lucretia took everything away: family, and love, and grief, and the horrible numbness of the unwinnable war. 

"You know what you did," Taako says slowly, "and you're going to have to live with it for the rest of your life. I don't have to do anything. I hate what you did to me, and you know that, and we could just -- just leave it there."

"If that's what you need," Lucretia says, low.

" _No_ , you dingus," Taako says. "You -- you're my _family_. I'm not just mad at you about Lup, do you get that? I spent a year on this moon base, calling you Madam Director in my own head, and you -- I fuckin' missed you, too, and when I remembered you, I--" He actually has to stop for a moment, the words getting tangled up in anger. "I'm mad you did this to _all_ of us, okay, _including you_."

Lucretia's eyes have gone very wide. "Taako, I--"

"Shh, shut up, just -- are you happy? This Bureau of Benevolence thing." Taako stares her down. "Are. You. Happy?"

"Yes!" Lucretia says. "This ... I finally have the chance to do good in a world that won't be taken away from us, _ever_ again. I ... really am happy, yes."

"Well," Taako says. "Good. Me too."

They stare at each other for a long moment.

"I'm still mad at you," Taako says. "Like. I'm probably gonna be mad at you for a long time. Stop sitting behind that desk and come here, I'm gonna give you a still-mad-at-you hug."

Lucretia laughs and stands, dashing the tears from her eyes. She comes around the desk to stand in front of Taako. They embrace, awkwardly, and if both of them finally relax, if Lucretia sniffles a little against Taako's shoulder, if the last hole in Taako's heart finally feels closed over, neither of them mention it aloud.

*

Kravitz visits. Taako's making macaroons. Kravitz watches Taako stir the batter from over Taako's shoulder, stepping up to push Taako's braid out of the way and kissing the back of his neck. Taako shivers happily and says, "Don't distract me. I still have to make the icing, get me the confectioner's sugar." 

"Big batch?" Kravitz asks, eyeing the size of Taako's batter bowl.

"Mmhm. I'm making a care package for the Bureau." Kravitz brings Taako the sugar, and Taako gives him a quick kiss in thanks. "Okay," Taako says, "pay attention, because I, uh, I want you to know your way around the kitchen, I'd like you to be around to help with the cooking and the baking and the -- the everything, I'd like you around."

"Taako," Kravitz says, "are you ... asking me to move in with you?"

"Well, yeah," Taako says, turning to give Kravitz a dazzling smile. "I've got a brand to maintain and a school to run, and you have some sort of weird afterlife bachelor pad. Obviously _you're_ the one who should move in with _me_."

"Oh." Kravitz looks a little dazed. "I ... I'd love to."

Taako kisses him again, a more lingering kiss, before remembering that if he leaves it for too long the butter will melt. He returns to the macaroons, and once they're in the oven, and he's begun work on the frosting, Kravitz adds, "But ... speaking of my afterlife bachelor pad, um, I looked into getting you dispensation, and if you ... wanted to take a vacation to the Astral Plane with me, we could make that happen."

"Babe," Taako says, turning to him, "is this a meet-the-in-laws situation?"

"Possibly," Kravitz admits. "If that's all right with you."

"Oh yeah," Taako says. "Lup says that the Raven Queen is a pretty chill boss. Only heard good things. I'd love to."

This time, they keep kissing long enough that the butter does melt, but Taako doesn't mind.

*

Taako sends the macaroons off to the Bureau of Benevolence. A few days later, he gets a thank-you note from Lucretia: _Every time, they're even more delicious than I remembered_. Taako holds the note for a long time, and it -- it's gonna be okay.

*

Summer again. Carey and Killian have chosen the one-year anniversary of the Day of Story and Song as the day to celebrate their wedding, and are holding it at a large nondenominational temple on a bluff overlooking the Stillwater Sea. The view is spectacular: small wildflower-covered islands dot the horizon, the body of the Judge that fell a year ago turned into something beautiful. Outside the temple, guests sip cocktails and mingle.

Taako is in the temple's kitchen, making sure that all the food for the wedding is up to standard. Lup's sitting at the counter, taste-testing everything with a wooden spoon and being incredibly helpful in the way only a sister can. "Just -- just one thing," Lup says, licking red sauce from the spoon. "One small criticism -- um, I think you may have forgotten to make it taste good."

"There's no accounting for taste," Taako says primly, trying to grab the spoon away from her while she continues to make extremely rude color commentary. They pause briefly when Ren comes in, carrying a pot of stew that smells exactly as amazing as it should. She sets the stew down and returns to the back room to fetch the next course, but her brief appearance has thankfully broken Lup's momentum.

"So," Lup says, "are you heading back to your big great school of magical awesomeness when this is all done?"

"Actually," Taako says, "I promised Kravitz that we'd take a vacay. We're gonna go on that side. Uh, I'm kind of dreading it." Because of the Raven Queen, he doesn't say -- no point worrying about meeting the in-laws, especially because Lup would certainly laugh at him for making a big deal out of it. "I wanted to go somewhere beach-y, but--"

Lup eyes him with the distrust of someone who's been a deliberate shit all afternoon and suspects turnabout. "You're going, sorry, you're going on an afterlife vacation? Is that even -- is that allowed?"

"Yeah, I think we're gonna be fine on that end," Taako says. He gives Lup a grin. "Plus, you don't have to pack sunscreen, which is huge."

Lup tastes the sauce again, and smiles, and puts the spoon down. "I'm really proud of you, Taako," she says. "It seems like -- it seems like you're really happy."

That ... is the word for it.

It's true, and it stays true while Barry pokes his head in to grab Lup so they can take their seats; it stays true when Kravitz comes by to compliment Taako's cooking and steal a kiss and leave again to save their places with Lup and Barry; it stays true even when Angus comes in to rudely refuse to abandon Lucas's academy _and_ has the temerity to tell Taako he knows about the silverware in the middle of a hug. Kid drives a hard bargain, which is why Taako likes him. He checks that all the food is prepped for serving one last time, and follows Angus out of the kitchen and into the main congregation hall. 

Lucretia is sitting in the front row, in a line of Bureau employees. Kravitz in the row directly behind, along with Barry and Lup, and as Taako comes over to sit next to him, Lucretia turns and catches Taako's eye. The smile she gives him is crooked and a little cautious, but -- today of all days, even the residue of Taako's anger isn't worth the effort. He grins back at her, squeezing Lucretia's shoulder in passing, and sits down between Kravitz and Lup.

Of the _Starblaster_ 's crew, only Davenport is absent, still on his sailing adventure around the world. Lup has her thigh pressed comfortably up against Taako's, her arm around Barry. Lucretia is leaning over in her seat, smiling as she murmurs something to Avi. Merle is waiting at the lectern, wearing the extremely well-made clerical garb of someone who's recently been elevated to earldom by the lord of Neverwinter. Magnus has just excused himself, as transparently as only Magnus can, and sidled off through a side door towards a frantically-gesturing Carey. 

Kravitz reaches down and takes Taako's hand in his. It's warm, and by now, Taako has enough experience with Kravitz's bizarre circulation to know that it doesn't have much to do with excitement, or magical effort, or anything besides pure emotion. Taako looks up at Kravitz, and Kravitz looks back the way he always does, like he can see Taako, like he sees the best possible version. Kravitz is smiling, affectionate and delighted, and today Taako doesn't want to look away.

*

Taako and Ren's catering is, of course, an absolute success. The cake, four tiers, has an enchanted spun-sugar mold of Killian and Carey embracing atop it, and the icing flowers on each slice bloom wider as the cake is cut. Magnus takes the first dance with Carey before twirling her off into Killian's arms, and the dance floor fills slowly as guests tear themselves away from the excellent food. Taako dances with Lup, with Magnus, with Ren, with Lucretia, with Kravitz. The sun sinks down glittering over the sea, and stars blink awake in the benign dark sky above.


End file.
